FIRST DAY OF CLASS MURDERED MY SOUL

Tuesday was my first ever on-campus class at Pace and even though it didn’t start until 6:15, I had to drag my ass down to FiDi from Astoria before 4:30pm just to collect my ID card. All my tuition money doesn’t cover stamps, apparently. 🙂

BE ME:

When I finally got to campus, right building, wrong entrance.

Sweating with heavy as hell backpack while I stalk the person who asked the same question just before me.

Found the entrance, didn’t have the proper vaccine app on my phone, accidentally filled out a one time form instead. They let my stupid ass in anyway and tell me to download the app, not fill out the form. Whatever! The QR code didn’t work!

Walked down a flight of stairs by accident and ended up with the janitors and other staff who HELLA JUDGED my noob self when I was like “where da fuck is auxiliary services?!”

Go back upstairs. It’s right around the corner from the front desk, no stair climbing required.

3 tries to understand that the masked staff person was asking for my student ID number, which I totes had saved but didn’t know which was which. (No that’s your actual ID, no that’s your email, no your User ID starts with U…” Oh okay. I actually have this saved in a Google doc — one thing I did correctly.

Actually get my ID printed out and receive it. Ask the man who gives it to me where I’d find my class if it’s on the 14th floor somewhere. This building? That building? He’s not sure but probably the building I said. That’s okay, I’ll figure it out!

Very sweaty walk to next logical building on Pace campus. Security guard says that I need to go to building on a different street.

Wherethefuckisthatstreet?

Of course it’s one of those NYC olden streets that turns into another street for NO REASON.

Sweaty, thirsty. Check phone to try and regroup. This street does not exist.

Walk all the way around the hospital and go back up. Find the street, but the next building with a Pace banner has a different street name on it.

More sweat. More confusion. People are looking at me and laughing. I die on the inside and walk around them when I backtrack.

Cut through park where I was just sitting and walk into building that is not even a Pace building and ask doorman where da fuck this street is. They are super nice and point me back the way I juuuust came.

Go into the obvious residence building that has a different street name on it. Plshelp.

Just make a right!

Across the street from the building I need to be in. Every number exists except the one I am looking for.

How.

I walk all the way down, the numbers go back down. Wrong way.

I ask a confused looking Gen Z if he’s looking for same building. No sorry. Are you a Pace student? Yes! Do you know where the building is?! No sorry. Oh okay, doesn’t hurt to ask! *Runs away shamefully*

He is probably scared and thinks I’m one of those mad black women the people from his flyover state warned him about. Sorry Gen Z, I’m just kidding you were sweet hahaha!

Call boyfriend and says it’s been one hot ass hour and I still can’t find this building. There is a sign on this scaffolding that says there is an entrance to a building on the same street with a different number around the corner. I haven’t tried that way yet, so might as well because I’m literally either about to go home and Zoom, or drop out of school completely.

Get to entrance — same sign but WITH THE WRONG NUMBER CROSSED OUT AND THE NUMBER I’VE BEEN LOOKING FOR SCRAWLED IN IT’S PLACE UGH!

I scream into the phone “I THINK THIS IS BUILDING ###?!” Annoyed looking man walking out says yes it is! I thank him profusely and also almost cry.

Go in, scan my brand new ID. SWAG.

Security guard says I need to show her the Pace vax pass. Show excelsior pass? No. Open Pace app — on here? Yes, fill out the form and show me the QR code.

Why!

Step to the side and do that as 70000 people effectively get into the building with no issues.

Finally get the green QR code and I’M IN. I’msohot.

Don’t stand too close to anyone on the elevator.

Floor is empty, but find my classroom.

Hallelujah.jpg

Sit in the common area and eat granola bar and drink HALF my tiny reusable water bottle to regroup. When I feel alive again, attempt to read for another class in the one hour 15 mins before my class starts.

See director of the program talking to IT. Hear her talking to my prof on the phone about HOW THE PROFESSOR CAN’T GET IN SO SHE IS GOING HOME TO ZOOM WITH THE CLASS.

This is my life. I should have just went home and tried to find it again next week.

Read until class. Everyone knows each other. No one sits next to me but I am thankful because I STANK at this point and I spend the next 3 hours after they figure out how to communicate with the prof on Zoom getting my learnin’ on but also trying not to expose my body parts too much because I am so self-conscious about my odor. I also look gross in the sea of adorable, 90% white, early-to-mid 20s women who apparently are all crushing it at life and work and school and I’m like… Fuck.

First impressions are everything!

Time sips of my VERY VERY limited supply of water bc too scared at this point to ask anyone if there’s a vending machine or water fountain in this building. Finish water by 715. Class over 9pm. I was shriveled up by the time I got home.

Dark and spooky (but rat-less) walk to City Hall from Campus. Need to get a taser. Stand close to emergency button and MTA employee box thingy, just in case.

Train comes 5 mins later. Headphones are dead. Read Kindle the entire journey home while on the brink of death.

BF meets me at the train station and holds my bag!! Buy 5000 vegan ramens at the bodega and immediately shower when I get home.

Basically die 2 hours later.

Well, I survived that first day and learned a lot but it really took so much out of me I took full advantage of having Yom Kippur off at GC and did nothing but watch teen dramas plan my next moves in my head.

I really needed it after that ordeal.

But today I successfully completed some general errands and schoolwork and I’m ready to get my school life back on track altho I am feeling stressed about being a bit behind now. If I can keep up this week then I think I can manage the semester.

At least I knew Tuesday was gonna be sux so it made going home and taking time to loaf soooo much more enjoyable. And at least I know that I will not have to deal w that nonsense again because I know what to expect and where to go!

DEFINITELY going to be talking to that Professor about Zooming in sometimes tho, I’m NOT trying to get COVID from that harrowing journey downtown. The more freedom I have to be flexible with my in-person attendance, the better I’ll feel about school in general!

Alsooooo I ordered a lot of cute clothes and I will definitely try to keep up with being stylish because I think it will help me perform better if I’m not constantly thinking I look frumpy (or if I’m mad frizzy and smelly!!!)